It's like getting your Learner's Permit and driving a Ferrari

Car analogies are the best when it comes to love. You have no idea how hard it is to be so human and such a sexual being the moment we arrive on the planet. As we grow up in our childhood homes, it's very difficult to be something 100% and never talk about it or slowly understand it one day at a time. Like driving a car. We sit in cars our whole life and whether it's in the back seat or in the front, we're not driving it. We can even know the entire route by heart and still have no clue the responsibility behind actually turning the wheel. We give our young adults more rules and regulations on driving a vehicle than we do understanding their bodies and their brains. How convenient that the person who begins to drive that vehicle doesn't get as much time on the body driving the car. Ever ponder why the world overlooks such a huge issue? It's how the enemy divides the world while no one is the wiser. We are so ashamed of sex and what it does to our bodies and how it makes us feel. Satan uses what God made to be so amazing and special in order to manipulate us into situations that can tear away at our value. It isn't always used for bad, it isn't always a subject of contention, but often times it isn't a subject many people want to get into due to its many confusing and challenging issues. I knew about my body. I knew I'd eventually be in a sexual relationship, but how did I end up starting a new relationship with this young man who I didn't know very well. I was no longer a virgin and that was dangerous territory. I had already put myself in 2 situations that ended up burning me good. I was so afraid, let's get it straight. I didn't think any man would ever love me or find me attractive or valuable. For so long, I was fat and so un-liked even by my own self that when the wrong guy came along (and they usually do), I made a stupid mistake. Ha! Not all mistakes are stupid, some are just necessary for understanding how things work and how to make the best of a situation. I did not need to lose my virginity against my will, and chalk it up to that I had made a mistake. I had. That guy took something from me due to his own mistakes in his life and where it lead him. He was thinking he could take anything from anyone he wanted to. That's on him, but where I'm concerned is where I hear a lot of young people today not taking ownership for what lead them right into making "stupid mistakes". The ones that we don't need to make. The ones that account for so many of the addictions, depressions and anxieties of today. I'm not sugar coating or making too big of a deal out of this. It's a serious subject that many do not have an opportunity to talk or be open to asking questions about. Do you think that because I believe in God, his son Jesus and the Holy Spirit that lives within me that I would not have had any temptations or mistakes to be upset or ashamed about???? I hope you answered No...that has nothing to do with it. THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT. Does it mean that people who go to church or grow up in church-going or spiritual homes will not have anything to be upset or ashamed about????? NOPE! You couldn't be more wrong. WE ALL HAVE STRUGGLES. WE ALL WILL HAVE SOME FORM OF STRUGGLE. There's no getting around that. It's not the end of the world. It can be tough to forgive yourself, but it's not impossible. You and I can dream all we want about driving a car when we are 16, but the reality is there is soooo much responsibility behind it. There's even scary times, when we make the wrong turn or take a corner too fast. It doesn't have to be stressful if both the teacher and the student work together to accomplish this task! The same goes for when we are dealing with relationships. We need good teachers, and young people need to be mindful that they are growing up and couldn't possibly know EVERYTHING just yet! It's not wrong to be young and growing and not know absolutely everything. It seems young teens feel like it's wrong to not know. Because we as adults haven't always treated teaching as an honor. For adults, it's an honor to show young people what's going to happen as they enter adulthood and how their feelings change. For children, it's a wonderful adventure to find your true self on the journey of growing up. It's not handled like that often. I can picture some of you shaking your heads like I fell off the turnip truck and it rolled over my head. I didn't say that all parents, teachers, friends, family and surrounding neighbors always act like it's an honor. In reality it is because they didn't have that kind of attention either. How can we emulate something we haven't seen or been taught????? It's completely illogical to think we just grow up to be something better without understanding what anything is or how to out do the last set of people who came before us. We all deserve to know that the purpose of being born into a family or born at all is to have people see us for what we are: Human. Totally human, which means needing someone to tell us what we are about to experience, how to adjust to the changes in our bodies and what we will be facing as Evil progresses in our society. We are so amazing when we work together and we stand up for what is right. We change the world when we Pray to the Lord and have the Holy Spirit enter in on our behalf and fight the battles for us. We all need to have time spent talking with us to develop an understanding of our bodies, what to do when sexual feelings come over us and how to make good choices when spending time with people we are interested in whether we decided prior to have sex or not. The idea that we are going to be prepared for this type of situation is CRAZY! Try jumping behind the steering wheel when you turn 16 and drive that car right out of the driveway just because you've been sitting in the backseat for 16 years. Lol. Not going to be a good outcome. We've learned that as a society already. We all need to be mentored. Sex is such a touchy subject once again because it has ties to being cast from the Garden of Eden. I don't want to go all preachy for those of you trying to figure out what the Bible is all about. This is my take on the situation. I adore the beginning and thinking about what would have gone through the minds of the only 2 people on the planet. I am fascinated by what must have completely changed psychologically the moment that Adam and Eve realized that they were naked. In that moment when Eve chose to sin and eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, she learned that her death would not be a physical one but rather a spiritual one. Just another learning moment for those precious people going ahead of us on this tough journey. They decided to clothe themselves because their sexual organs and naked skin was something of sexual stimulation and because they had never experienced that before they didn't know how to address it (no pun intended;). They had stimulation overload within seconds of sinning. Nakedness and sexual arousal were going to be things the Devil used to manipulate other people who don't have an opportunity to learn about the enemy and how he tears down. I hope that you're following my line of thinking here. This means that every person on the planet has to have someone (or a group of people) explain all the minute details of how to develop your own walk with the Lord and how to be involved with your own body so that you too have a chance to grow and help another. This means that parents are given the first right of teaching the necessary skills to deal with changes and difficulties that will come your way. It sounds easy enough but it's so much harder because of what can happen with anxiety and poor family relationships due to each individual's self esteem. We need to have a high regard for our own body before we can learn to hold up boundaries on our self. I learned to love myself along the way and often now have people tell me that my self esteem is incredible. So much of what people factor as self esteem is: liking the way you look, the way you make money, what family you come from or even if you went to college. Maybe it's predicated on if you're married with children or live in a fancy house. I've come to learn the complete opposite. I've come to learn self esteem is what makes you strong enough to stand up against the social norms for good reason. I've come to learn that it is in liking yourself completely, absolutely 100%, without anything else. Just you. That "YOU" that you take everywhere to brighten everyone's day as you come upon them. The man or woman that God has designed you to be. To share your light wherever you go and to tell of his love for them by showing them love. To be fully interested in the life that is all around you. To be interested in yourself as you are a creation of God and he has interest in you worshiping him. I believe we worship him all day long when we realize how amazing we are. When we get that human life isn't so crappy and it is worth the uphill battles. I let the wrong kind of love in when I was struggling with my self worth. I let "sex" be the main factor as I was purging out the food issue my parents had brought to the table. I could have made it a lot worse by adding in other addictions. I was spared from the desire to indulge them. To this day I have never used or been offered any kind of drug, alcohol or cigarette. For that, I am grateful. I know that there are going to be some of you out there that will not be able to say that. Drugs, pills, alcohol and other self deprecating forms of habits are seeming to be around every corner. You may find yourself being asked if you want to go to parties and join in just to be noticed or feel apart of the crowd. I am not unaware of how special everyone wants to feel and when someone starts to pay attention to you where no one else seems to be doing just that, it can lead to reeeaaallly bad decisions. I wanted to get down to the real basics here before we move on. I wanted to pour out my heart and let you know I've been down this tough road where you need to make decisions for your body and your sexuality and it's going to be tough. I want you to know you need to work on loving everything about yourself by accepting you're human and work on the areas that you can. NEVER NEVER NEVER give up on yourself. We are in this together and it's a process to understand your brain and it's functions. I will continue to pour out what I've learned so we can go this road together. I'll be your driving instructor for this ride!!!!