Monday, January 16, 2017
Let's travel 15 years into the future! Boom......were here. I sit in the same living room as I type out this blog and can also see the young woman that I was at the time of purchasing this place. What a gift to have been able to achieve such a wonderfully small place to call my own. I have had so many great memories here that the few bad ones just fade into the dust. I love this house so much! Not so much because it's extravagant, rather because it is simplistic. It is enough. It is just right. I can't explain the contentment. It's ability to hold me safe at night, be close to all things me and yet still fit my style and continual need to change. My condo was going to be this sweet consistent tool for my life very much like my spiritual walk. Always here, always growing, changing and helping others do the same. It is an extension of me. You have to be able to get outside of any comfort zone to really understand why I can compare my faith to an actual item or space in my human life. This home represents the faith that I have as a woman. This home from the moment you arrive is set up in a way to give life, love, laughter and a bit of elegance among the status quo that is right outside. My streets are lined with the most beautiful of trees and each driveway carefully placed outside each home. Each night when I drive home from work exhausted and hangry, I am just minutes from my sweet little escape. I have loved sharing this story with so many people over the years. It's connection to me isn't like most considering it was bought at such a young age of 21 and single. It's more of me than anyone else that comes into it, but just like me, anything I have is open. I always want people to feel comfortable and welcome when they come into my house. I have felt the other side of being unwelcome and uncomfortable the entire time I was growing up or how my ex controlled how long people stayed because he couldn't let anyone in. The journey to reveal who I wanted to be started very young for me. 17 choosing my career and then moving out at 18, then buying my first house at the age of 21. Life was going so quickly. I loved every minute of it. Yet I still have this little piece of property and am as content as can be. My husband and I now have goals that include this condo one day being rented, but never sold. Never thrown away. I would never sell this place. It is not a stepping stone, rather part of the whole picture. When you have no regrets you can understand everything in your life is for a reason. If a painter were to paint my life some of the most beautiful parts would be the dark areas. Where the black and shadows change the way a person sees the Light and all it's reflection! See without it you can't understand the beauty in it's entirety. Before I knew it I was in my house and loving every minute of it. I enjoyed the hustle bustle of everyday. I knew then I was a person of structure. I love to be in control of my environment. I can arrange and rearrange and tidy and nap and just "be". It really is great when you understand your single life is as good as it gets when you're not in a relationship. You need to know who that person is before you can really represent yourself in a healthy way, and know your boundaries. It was tough for me in the beginning with my relationships because as much as I love to be single I also love to be in a relationship. Go figure. I'm a go either way. The real issue is my love language is words of affirmation and quality conversation. Since I had been neglected as a young girl and woman when it came time and of age to be able to really gauge that for myself I longed for it. I always was and am still looking for those words to see if people see what I see. The greatness that I see in life, my career and myself. For years I starved for any nurturing at all. So once I was in a position to be in a relationship I took it. Luis was someone I thought I'd never achieve. From chubby conervative to fashion forward Designer was a huge change. I was much safer in my own environment, but not for long. As is and you will see throughout the blog. The minute I settle in, someone is right around the corner waiting to ruffle my feathers.